DAVID GREENE, HOST:
Good morning. I'm David Greene. How bad are the NFL's Cleveland Browns? Well, a local comedian called their stadium a factory of sadness. And the team failed to win a single game last year, so the coach punished himself by jumping in a frigid lake. Well, this season, Bud Light has set up special refrigerators at bars around town. They are full of free, cold beer. Smart technology will unlock them only when the Browns win. Great. So Browns fans can stare at locked-up beer to remind them of their misery.
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