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Panel Questions

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We're playing this week with Joanna Hausmann, Maeve Higgins and Alonzo Bodden. And here again is your host, experiencing human contact for the first time this week, Peter Sagal.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Bill. In just a minute, Bill stars opposite Chelsea Peretti in "Brooklyn Rhyme-Rhyme." It's our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924.

Right now, panel, it is time to answer some questions about this week's news. Alonzo, as the lockdown enters year 46, I think - I don't know. It's been so long - The Wall Street Journal is reporting that many people have begun doing what?

ALONZO BODDEN: Can you give me a hint? Because there's...

SAGAL: Yeah.

BODDEN: ...So many answers to that.

SAGAL: People are, like, I thought this Zoom meeting was black tie-optional.

BODDEN: People are dressing up for Zoom.

SAGAL: People are dressing up again.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: That is what The Wall Street Journal says, anyway.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)

SAGAL: According to them, people are just tired after so many months of wearing pajamas and sweatpants all day. And they want to go back to the way things used to be - you know, haphazardly throwing on button-up chinos and running out the door only to discover a massive Sriracha stain on your collar seconds before walking into the office. People miss that.

The CEO of Bloomingdale says people are buying more designer shoes and handbags right now than this time they were last year, which is weird because no one's going anywhere. Even - so I guess they just wanting to impress their Keurig machines and their confused pets.

(LAUGHTER)

BODDEN: Oh, I think - what did you say, shoes and handbags?

SAGAL: Yeah.

BODDEN: Yeah, I think that makes perfect sense. You know why?

SAGAL: Why?

BODDEN: Because those are the only things that still fit after sitting around...

(LAUGHTER)

BODDEN: ...For seven months...

SAGAL: Oh, my God.

BODDEN: ...Binge-eating. You're like, OK, I'm going to get a really nice bag and some shoes.

SAGAL: When did they...

BODDEN: And we'll not talk about anything else.

SAGAL: Wouldn't it be awful, Alonzo, if you had to go buy a new handbag because your hand had become too fat to fit through the straps?

(LAUGHTER)

BODDEN: Exactly.

SAGAL: Maeve, citizens of Ireland - you may have heard of it...

MAEVE HIGGINS: Uh-huh.

SAGAL: ...Have become enraged over something to the point that the Irish embassy in the U.S. has even registered a complaint. They're all upset about what?

HIGGINS: Oh, Fungie the dolphin has gone missing.

SAGAL: No, that's not it. But what? What?

HIGGINS: The dolphin Fungie, who's, like, Ireland's most famous dolphin, has sadly gone missing and is presumed dead. And everyone is so upset about it.

SAGAL: Ireland has a famous dolphin called Fungie?

HIGGINS: Yeah. Fungie is, like, probably the biggest celebrity in the country or at least in the water around the country. And he's...

SAGAL: Where does he normally live, this dolphin?

HIGGINS: In a place called Dingle. And he's...

SAGAL: Fungie from Dingle.

HIGGINS: ...Seven years old.

SAGAL: Fungie the Dingle Dolphin has gone missing.

JOANNA HAUSMANN: Maeve, are you making this up?

HIGGINS: No. I definitely realize that it sounds like I'm being - you know, that I'm from the Shire or something.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: That's an amazing story. And had we known about it, we probably would have asked somebody about it, but we didn't. Instead, we're asking you about something else - another sort of scandal or cause for complaint.

HIGGINS: Oh.

SAGAL: We have a hint for you. Remember...

HIGGINS: OK.

SAGAL: ...Just to set it up - so everybody in Ireland, newspaper columnists and the Irish embassy in the U.S. have gotten very upset about something.

HIGGINS: OK.

SAGAL: And Bill is going to give you a sort of audio hint.

KURTIS: Top of the morning to ya.

HIGGINS: Oh, Bill. It's the movie with the (laughter) - it's the movie with the bad Irish accents.

SAGAL: Yes...

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: ...The movie with the bad Irish accents.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)

SAGAL: Yes. People in Ireland are very upset...

KURTIS: (Laughter).

SAGAL: ...About the terrible, fake Irish accents...

HIGGINS: Yeah.

SAGAL: ...That are apparently in the new movie "Wild Mountain Thyme," at least judging from its trailer. I will quote the Irish Times film critic Donald Clark. (Imitating Irish accent) "What in the name of Holy Bejaysus (ph) and all the suffering saints..."

HIGGINS: (Laughter).

SAGAL: (Imitating Irish accent) "...Is this benighted cowpat?" - unquote.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Even the...

HIGGINS: Take that back.

SAGAL: (Laughter). Even the leprechaun...

BODDEN: So, Peter, you were in the movie.

SAGAL: I was in the movie, apparently.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Even - and even - there's a leprechaun museum in Ireland. I did not know that.

HIGGINS: There is, yeah.

SAGAL: Even they were upset. They said, even we think this is a bit much.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So the trailer's online. You can see it. The film stars Emily Blunt and Jamie Dornan doing accents so bad they go back in time and give Dick Van Dyke the Oscar for his work in "Mary Poppins."

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And - which is weird because Jamie Dornan is Irish. But still, the best part, though, is Christopher Walken, not Irish, pretending to be Irish. Imagine Christopher Walken sounding like Christopher Walken trying to sell you Lucky Charms.

HIGGINS: (Laughter).

SAGAL: Well, actually, you don't have to imagine it. Here is that famous, hoary, old Irishman, Christopher Walken.

(SOUNDBITE OF TRAILER FOR "WILD MOUNTAIN THYME")

CHRISTOPHER WALKEN: (As Tony Reilly) Welcome to Ireland.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

WALKEN: (As Tony Reilly) Once upon a time, there were two farms...

(SOUNDBITE OF SHEEP BLEATING)

WALKEN: (As Tony Reilly) ...The Muldoon farm where Rosemary lived...

HIGGINS: (Laughter).

(SOUNDBITE OF TRAILER FOR "WILD MOUNTAIN THYME")

WALKEN: (As Tony Reilly) ...And right down the road was my farm.

HIGGINS: Granddad - is that you?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Did it bring you back home, Maeve?

HIGGINS: I just want to say there's not sheep in the background of every - we have cities. We have electricity. It's really not how it - how they make it seem.

SAGAL: Really? So it's not...

HIGGINS: Yeah.

SAGAL: It's not that bucolic pastoral paradise that...

HIGGINS: I mean, it is. But...

(SOUNDBITE OF THE POGUES SONG, "IF I SHOULD FALL FROM GRACE WITH GOD") Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

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